Dating 3-day rule | Is it outdated?

Should you follow the dating 3-day rule? Well, let’s start at the beginning. Have you ever asked the parents for relationship advice? No! Right? Well, I am not surprised the dating time of your parents and today’s generation is entirely different. Your mother will never think of dating someone on the internet, and your father will be shocked by the woman who makes the first move.

The dating 3-day rule is a strategy that recommends waiting at least three days before calling your date after you go out. Making contact after three days will not make you look desperate. Besides, it will give time for both people to think if they like each other.

In an ideal world, we wouldn’t have to overthink our decisions. Neither have we had to regret telling someone about our feelings. But unfortunately, it’s easier said than done. Dating has changed so much in the last few years that it is difficult to determine which dating rule still works.

What is 3 day dating rule?

What is 3 day dating rule?

Whether you start counting the day you two have a date or the day you exchange numbers, the idea behind the dating 3-day dating rule is not to look desperate. Sustained, immediate contact through the DM or text can make you look desperate and eager. Continuous and quick contact after exchanging numbers can give an impression of a person with a poor sense of respecting boundaries.

But at the same time, some people can take it as usual, so it varies from person to person. When should you start your clock? The movie swinger in the pre-text era covers it nicely; It says that it can be a two-day rule for some while it can be an ingrained social norm for some.

Take the three-day rule as a sign that you are not the person who will cling to somebody right after the first date. Remember that the world will not stop if you skip one or two hours or even an afternoon. They can be inflexible and rigid. The main point is that boundaries are essential.

Does the dating 3-day rule exist in the texting era?

With time, text technology has broadened the conversation. So, in that case, follow the lead of your partner. If they didn’t respond to your message, leave them alone. It might be possible that they are following the dating 3-day rule, and your continuous text can give your impression as a clingy person.

In most cases, the other person isn’t rude; they are just following what they think is right and setting some boundaries in the early stage of a relationship. Push too hard can close the door that was opened for you. So instead of being harsh, wait for a little.

The same goes for the conversation. Stay away from playing games, as one person’s continuous engagement in the texts means either the other person is busy or uninterested in you. You can send a bit of polite follow-up text, but only a little. Don’t instantly ask him for his plans or a date but a little continuation of the conversation you were having before. For instance, the latest episode of your favorite show or an exciting movie conversation.

If the last text was about the follow-up date means the confirmed date, and they ghost you, then don’t text. Take the hint, as they have already shown what they want.

Will waiting 3 days ruin your chances?

Waiting 3 days for a follow-up text or call may not completely ruin your chances. Everyone knows it’s a busy world, and responsible person prefers career-oriented men and women. But at the same time, it’s also possible that no text makes him think you have ghosted them. They might be putting their time and energy into some other person.

It’s 100% possible that the next date has been three days before, and you already sent him a follow-up message, so if you have met the date in person and like his personality, why wait for 3 days? In the other scenario, it’s possible that they are just busy even if your date isn’t chatting with another person.

Many single people don’t have an active dating life. Still, they may be very busy with work, social life, side hustling, or a potential recreational hobby like a tantra training class or an intramural softball league.

If you even wait three days to make a move, they will still be booked with other engagements, and you will have to wait to see them again.

Many 20s need to learn about the rule

I know many people in their twenties who haven’t heard of this rule. Many of my colleagues don’t even know about it. Most of them think of it as a match-making service with the same name.

There is also an unwritten rule that you should wait for at least three dates before entering a physical relationship. I am in my late 30s, and the fact that most of my colleagues didn’t know about this rule indicates that it’s an outdated one for this generation.

The writer for Elle asks her seniors about the dating 3-day rules, and most other people say they don’t know about it. After her search, she claims that this rule is dead by this time.

What people expect now for texting after their first date

Most females will agree that we hope for a text or call after the first dinner date. If he didn’t text to say he enjoyed your company, I consider it the end from his side. And if I receive his text after three days, I will think he is playing games with me, and indeed I am not interested in it.

Besides, if the date is going well, it is common to decide to go on another date on the same day. Some suggest talking to your partner about going on another date the same day and then texting him after two to three days to plan it officially.

For example, when you two are going apart, say that you love her company and would like to go on another date if you agree. Suppose your date agrees; text her something like hey! I hope you are enjoying your week. Do you want to hit the arcade this weekend?

Texting your text early doesn’t mean you have to chit-chat; you can come to the point and ask her out, asking if she is interested. If you are interested, show her through your text but talk less at the start, as texts can result in misinterpreting things.


No doubt leaving a little mystery and playing hardtop get works every time. But these days, youngsters are tired of these silly dating rules and want to make a move fast. They are more impatient and want to get everything they want with a button click.

My advice is to maintain a little mystery in the relationship by not sharing every single thing of your day. Instead, focus on knowing each other habits and behavior that will help you to take the next step in the relationship. These small things help you move from seeing someone to dating someone.


  • What is the 72-hour rule in dating?

It’s a straightforward dating rule that suggests if you hate the other person’s action or behavior and they are irritating you, then wait 72 hours before showing your reaction. In simple words, hold your response for 72 hours instead of coming to an instant conclusion.

  • Do guys follow the dating 3-day rule?

According to the survey, only 9% of the men successfully secured a dating follow-up date after waiting three days. Half of these successful men have to devise a strong excuse so the women can reconsider them.

  • What is the 222 dating rule?

The 222 dating rule was to make sure that the couple is spending time together and that it can strengthen their bond. The 222 dating rule suggests going on a date every two weeks, spending a weekend away from home, and going on a weeklong vacation every two years.

  • What’s the 3-day no-contact rule?

The 3-day no-contact rule is for starters in which you don’t text, meet, or contact your potential date. It’s to see if the potential date will reach you and to give the impression of a person who respects boundaries in a relationship.

  • What not to do at the start of a relationship?

Here are a few things you should avoid at the start of the relationship:

  • Moving too fast in a relationship
  • Being rigid for what you want
  • Coming too strong
  • Not establishing the clear boundaries
  • Posting a lot of online
  • Ignoring the red flags
  • Not maintaining the edges at the start

  • What are the red flags in dating?

Here are some red flags to watch out for in a relationship:

  • They aren’t supportive of your goals
  • The relationship revolves around them
  • They make you feel bad about yourself
  • They don’t listen to you
  • They are forcing you into a physical relationship when you are not ready
  • They are abusive

  • What is the rule of 7 in dating?

Rule of 7 means half of your age plus seven. This rule of dating is to determine if age is socially acceptable. And it says to not date someone less than half your age plus seven years.


R Sehar

R Sehar

I am a licensed therapist and life coach who specializes in relationships. I help strong, empowered women develop healthy, fulfilling relationships with themselves and those around them. My clients often struggle with mental health issues such as anxiety, depression & addiction. I work with them to create a healthier mindset and lifestyle that supports their worthiness for love.

1 Comment
  1. […] The 3-day dating rule is for the starters in which you take a 3-day break from messaging, contacting, and even texting your potential partner. The idea behind it is not to look desperate.  […]

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