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20 signs that your ex just wants to be friends

R Sehar

Catching the hint right is easier said than done. Motives can be sketchy sometimes, and when it comes to trust, they are called ex for a big reason. I know many people in a situation where they had to ask themselves does their ex wants them back or wants to be friends.

Generally, it all depends on the type of relationship you have with your ex. But when we start digging into that, it becomes complicated. In the following 20 signs that your ex just wants to be friends, I will help you explore the boundaries of when you should throw a stop sign.

Why Would Your Ex Want To Be Friends Anyway?

There can be different reasons that your ex wants you to be friends. It can be because he is finding a familiar place to land or trying to keep the peace. But the first thing you should do is put all the previous signs into context.

1. Did you have the same friend circle?

When a relationship ends, everyone wants to claim the friend to them may be to feel a little better. Sometimes to avoid unnecessary drama, it’s vital to clear the air so that you can peacefully face each other.

Bumping into each other can be a disaster. Maintaining a friendly or buddy-buddy relationship will help you to face each other without interrupting your familiar friends getting to gatherings or parties.

2. Was the breakup hostile?

Sometimes the ex wants the environment to be peaceful, but sometimes he wants to feel better about the past circumstances. Clearing guilt is vital to lead a quiet life. It’s possible that he is feeling guilty and wants to make the situation a little better.

But the most important thing is that you have gone through the situation, and you know the reason behind the breakup. You can decide if you want to make the situation a little better or not.

3. Were you friends before?

When you go through a breakup, it doesn’t mean you suddenly don’t have any feelings. After a breakup, many relationships start as solid friendships. And there are chances that your ex is willing to continue the pure friendship relation.

When the situation is good, a relationship can turn into a friendship without long-term expectations.

20 Signs That Your Ex Just Wants To Be friends

Here are the most common signs that your ex just wants to be friends. It is a common saying that past behavior predicts future behavior. When you are looking into a relationship, keep this point in mind.

If your ex is still in friendly contact with their exes, that means he is an evolved person with a mature mindset of having a friendly relationship with their ex. When they offer to have a friendly relationship, they are not expecting anything less or nothing more than that.

01. You deserve more than that

When you have the same circle of friends and colleagues, your ex may want to maintain peace and comfort while you run into one another. Your ex may feel guilty about the past and wants you to start dating a good guy.

He may want to maintain some connections without having any commitment. It’s a situation where you must set some boundaries for this relationship. If someone unintentionally hurts the other person, that’s not a friendship. Regardless you have had a romantic relationship in the past.

02. They have no relation with an ex….. Never

Again it’s not 100% that he is making an exception for you and wants to get back together with you. However, if he is among the people who don’t want to disturb and complicate relations, he wants to be friends again.

You can do some clever things to get your ex back, but again, have control over your expectations.

03. You are the dumper

When you are the dumper and have suddenly dropped him like a hot potato, he wants to know many things. Any person would like to see the reason behind it.

If your ex invites you for a coffee, don’t start assuming situations. They may not be dying to get back to you. There are maximum chances that they are curious to know the main reason behind the breakup.

And if you ask my suggestion, you owe them this.

04. They haven’t contacted you

If your ex hasn’t contacted you for a while, there are maximum chances that he has moved on with his life. I am not talking about months here; I am talking about years and, in some cases, even more. The complete no-contact rule benefits the better evolvement of a person.

After that much time believe he can be a different person. Besides, he might be dating someone.

05. They don’t answer your sweet messages

Thinking he is awkward or shy, you take the first step and send some sweet messages. Were you hoping for a long reply, but he just ignored it? It doesn’t mean they are playing hard to get or being pathetic. He sets clear boundaries between your relations as he doesn’t want you to have any expectations.

But if you want to give your relationship a second chance, sending sweet messages will not work. Ask him for coffee and discuss things.

06. They aren’t nervous in your company

Sometimes being around the person we are deeply in love with can be awkward. Such a situation makes you a little jittery, nervous, and sweaty. That’s not ideal. No wonder people say don’t work with an ex if you still have feelings. It can affect the work quality.

If your ex is okay with being in your company, he may have moved on. He might not be faking it and wants to keep a friendly relationship with you.

07. They are not trying to impress you

As I mentioned earlier, he might have completely moved on. He doesn’t want to impact your life and doesn’t care if you are happy, furious, sad, or horny. If you hate them smoking, he might now be doing it in front of you.

They have long hair because you like them, but now he may get a shortcut. They aren’t doing it to irritate you, but it’s just that they don’t care about you now. It’s also possible that he is trying to identify his personality.

08. They have to stop being pathetic

After the breakup, they used to do pathetic things like sending drunken text messages, gifs, memes, or sometimes threats. You hate receiving these messages and gifts, but they have been quiet for that time.

There is a possibility that they still aren’t over you, but now they don’t miss you as before. Time slowly heals all the wounds; though it may be tricky the first time makes it easy for the dumpier to move on.

If they have stopped doing sad things and bothering you, they have just moved on and want to be friends only.

09. Their IG is flooded with their new partner’s pic

It might be possible that your ex is just faking a relationship to get over you. But if it has been a while, they note that he has actually gotten over you, and now he wants to be friends.

If they want you to be together, then they will not make any such move to be together with you that will make things worse between you and him.

10. Your relationship is a lesson to them

He killed your plants, and you threw your clothes out the window. The girl was in a toxic relationship, and you both were involved in the drama. But now it’s all over, and they don’t care anymore.

Maybe they now understand that you are not for each other, or they have started to move on. But there can be a chance if you show him the new person you are becoming. Show him the way things will change in your relationship. By showing all the positive vibes, his mean comments will only be a thing of the past, and you can have the relationship you have always dreamed of.

11. They are asking for love advice

It is the old technique of the exes to ignite your hidden feelings for them. However, if your ex constantly talks about his partner, even with his other friends, he is undoubtedly not making it up to make you jealous.

They may ask you for an honest opinion as you probably know him more than others. It can also be a direct signal that now you are no more than a friend. Being with true love makes friendship with an ex way easier.

12. They have changed their relationship status on social media

Changing the relationship status on social media platforms is a loud and clear declaration. It applies to breakups and new relationships as well. If your ex has changed his relationship status from in a relationship to single, he is probably over you.

But if you have a very manipulative or attention-seeking ex, the situation can be anything. Who knows what’s in their mind? In such cases, please don’t bother to unfriend them.

13. They look happy with someone

You might not be happy to see him moving on so fast, but the truth is in front of you. Your ex has found the one for him and is madly in love. His nature has become giggly, his eyes are sparkling, and he can’t hide a smile from his face.

It’s a clear sign that he is very happy and wants to be friends with you. But if you aren’t moving on, you will only hurt yourself in it. It will not be easy to see him so mad in love while you are struggling.

14. They tell you the bad stuff

Suppose they are telling you some bad things like they didn’t quit smoking or maybe about their lover. It’s a clear sign that he doesn’t care about your feelings anymore, and you are nothing more than a past for them.

Overcoming the past relationship makes them honest with you, and they probably want to give a start to the friendship with clear thoughts and mind.

15. They want you to move on

They may start teasing you with the other guy or girl’s name in such cases. They are not doing it to annoy you by saying, “No, you are the person I truly love,” but they may think that person would be a perfect match for you.

They want you to be happy and find an ideal partner to fall in love with. Besides, when you both find true love, your awkwardness will automatically fade. And it wouldn’t cause any confusion that there is still something between you two.

16. Their eyes don’t have any traces

Wise people say that the eyes are the windows to the soul. They probably moved on a long time ago if you just have an incredible and calm feeling in their eyes. If they have moved on, they will look at you the same way they look at their buddies.

A person who loves you always has a lingering and loving stare. Besides, they may be checking out other people as they take you as their other buddies.

17. There is no sexual tension

Sexual tension is just like a magnet, attractive or repulsive. You two can’t get away from each other or don’t even want to share the same table. There is no middle situation.

If you aren’t feeling this repulsion or attraction between each other, there is probably nothing more than a pure friendship between you two.

18. They feel the guilt

If they are the dumper, then they may experience the dumper guilt. It makes them feel bad about themselves when they confront you. That’s when instead of facing you to talk, they prefer disappearing.

But; once the guilty one sees that you have started to move on, they will come to check if you are okay. They will be willing to have a good friendship bond but nothing more than that. It’s unfair, as they can’t be good while breaking up. Now they want to eradicate their guilt.

19. They are not sending any sweet messages

Your ex is making it clear that they want a friendly relationship with you. They want to ensure your feeling is clear by sending sweet and cute messages. They want to be clear that you are now their friend and nothing more or less.

They know their confusing message can change your feelings, so they avoid sending messages such as I miss you, even as a friend. At least for a specific period.

20. They are openly discussing your relationship

When a person moves on, you can observe drastic changes in his personality. You know he is over you when he can talk about the past without regret or resentment. He will then have a much clearer perspective on things.

If they are guilty, without any second thought, they will accept that they were wrong back then. They are being this clear because they think you have also moved on with your life.

Conclusion

If your ex is caring and sweet, then don’t assume that he wants you to get back. He may have a caring and sweet nature towards every person. The signs, as mentioned earlier, that your ex wants to be friends will help you to clear the confusion.

Breakups can be disturbing, and it’s normal to have many questions in mind. For example, you might be in a stage thinking that you should try getting back together or you ate better off being friends.

In such cases, outside help can be beneficial. I felt very relaxed after talking with a gifted advisor during a painful breakup. He was insightful, kind, and understood my situation without any judgment.

FAQ’s

• What does it mean when your ex says you are unique but not extra special?

It can signify that your ex is making boundaries with you. Don’t misinterpret his sweetness, as he has clearly mentioned that you are unique as you were in a relationship with them, but now there is a pure friendship between you two.

• My ex is not bitter anymore. Does he want to get back?

When they show their anger towards you, that means they still care about you but being indifferent shows that they have moved on. They may not be faking it and moving on means they have stopped considering their past.

• Why it’s essential to take seek from experts

Taking advice from an expert will help you to figure out the solution with the help of some solid facts and experienced based information.

• How do I know if my ex is being friendly?

If your ex is talking about being open and single, he is trying to get back. But if he is friendly, he will surely know the boundaries and never create a misunderstanding. In the case of good friendship, they may talk about the lack of events in their calendar but not more.